I was in the middle of the chaos, that was an excuse for an outdoor rock concert. I had been asked by a friend of mine to go with him. He had an extra ticket and I had no objection to freebies. But now I was thinking it was not the best idea.
The band on stage was playing loudly but I heard little of it over the din of noise and shouting going on around me. My best solution to the problem was to get higher than I already was and make the best of it. Leaning into my friend I shouted, “Hey, man, they are selling beer back by where we came into this jungle. I am in need of a brew. You want to come?” He shook his head no. I shrugged and was sure I would never find him again in this mess, so I said, “Ok, then I will probably meet you at the car when this thing is over.” It was his turn to shrug.
As I pushed through the sea of people. It was like a salmon swimming upstream, the crowd seemed to be ever surging in the direction of the stage. I was heading away, and the effort was wearing me out and ticking me off. Within 100 yards of the concession stand everything came to a complete stop. Being taller than most I could see a knot of people about half way. It did not look good. I was sure a fight had broken out and it was spreading in my direction. Trying to back pedal. I felt my foot come down a what I assumed was either something on the ground or another person’s foot. There was no surprise when I heard a screech and was shoved. Then a woman’s shrill voice, “Hey (expletive), are you trying to break my ankle?” Quickly lifting my foot but still moving backward, I came even with my victim. She was short, redheaded and had balled up fists. Throwing up my hands I said, “I am sorry but if you want to hit me do it now because if not there are some real fists being thrown about 20 feet from us. If we don’t get out of here it is going to hurt.”
It was like she had not noticed the whirlwind of people not heading our way. And standing on her tip toes strained to see. I made a decision and grabbed her by the arm, risking her wrath and weighing it against the mob’s. She didn’t resist as much as I thought she would and soon we were making a retreat heading not toward the stage but laterally away from the approaching brawl.
Within a minute or so both of us, with effort found ourselves near the hurricane fence that was at the perimeter of the crowd. There was breathing room at last. Letting go of her arm, I apologized, “I am sorry, but I didn’t really think I had much of a choice. You can hit me now if you feel like it.” I saw fleeting anger flash into her eyes then they softened. She turned to look and from our vantage point could see the area we had just vacated was now engulfed in chaos as security guards rushed in to break up the mob. She turned back to me with a smile, “How could I hit you, my hero!” Her words dripped with sarcasm but there was also a note of relief. As we looked out on the spectacle that was this thing called a rock concert, I so wanted just to be somewhere peaceful. But as the music blared from speakers and the crowd noise swelled, I realized this was my world. There was no peace unless I found it in my drug of choice, alcohol. I bent down and asked the girl if she wanted to get out of here. I knew a place that served a mean drink and man, was it quiet. She nodded ok.
“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled; do not be afraid.” (John 14:27) Jesus spoke these words to reassure his frightened disciples that his imminent departure was a good thing and necessary. To me these words have been part of my transformation, they spoke to me about the life I came from. His words, “I do not give it to you as the world gives…” are so true. For me the world never offered me true peace only a false or manufactured version of it. In fact, the only peace and solace I could find involved escape from the world I knew with alcohol and drugs.
But the peace offered by Jesus is so different. In a troubled and fear mongering world only He can and does bring real and sustained peace. The thing is the world has not changed. Or if it has, it is only for the worse. Yet in the midst of it I now find I have what the apostle Paul describes, “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, and it will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:7) No drug of any kind can offer it and no human hand can deliver it. True peace of God comes through surrender at the foot of the cross of Jesus Christ. That is where I found it and I am still amazed by it.
But back in that world and on that crazy day, I left my friend behind and with a girl I didn’t even know, ran to find ‘peace’ in a dark bar and copious amount of alcohol and lines of drugs. Somewhere during that night before I left the bar she slipped away. I never saw her again. Just two people lost and seeking peace but finding loneliness and turmoil. When I remember and write about any one from back in the day, I pray for them. I do so today, and I pray for all to find the peace that only comes from the true source. May it be yours today!
Happy Sabbath and Blessings,
John
1/11/19
