“What are you a funny guy or something?” the man across from me said. I looked at him as seriously as I could, then said in return, “I did not mean it to be funny, do I look like I am joking?” With that he was silent and seemed to be trying to assess the situation. I could see he was coming to a decision and with a couple long nods of his head, he said, “OK, partner, you seriously want me to get you into the red zone? If I do it, it is going to cost you!” With that he took a long pull off of his drink, then held the empty glass toward me. I knew that buying him a drink would be the cheapest part of the bargain we were about to make.
In May of 1980, I had moved from Denver, Colorado to Washington state. There were several nuke plants under construction in the state at the time. A few in the Pasco area and two near Elma, in the Olympic National Forest. I chose the Elma project known as Satsop or WPPSS #3 & 5. It was my plan to work these until completion. Little did I know how much disaster was awaiting the project, the state and my own life. Within a week of my arrival, Mt. St. Helens let go a massive eruption burying eastern Washington in ash. And a week later it did it again this time sending its ash over the Western portion of the state where I lived and worked.
The effect of that was devastating. Causing loss of life and in my case loss of work and pushed my already disintegrating marriage closer to the brink. But along with that it fascinated me. I was living within a few hundred miles of an active volcano and like so many others after seeing pictures of it on TV and in the newspapers, I wanted a closer look. Now I sat across from one of the people who could get me there.
After a little more negotiation, it was settled. The price was steep, but I had expected that. He had also warned me that, yes, he could get me into the red zone but once I was in, I would be on my own. Giving me directions how I could slip out without getting caught, there would be no guarantees. It bothered me little, I was willing to risk it just to get some pictures and see this cataclysm close up.
A week later he picked me up at the same bar. The ride was pretty much silent, the only conversation was more warning of the danger and more warnings of the cost if I was caught inside the zone. For my part there was a lot of head nodding. Within an hour we were approaching the restricted area. He stopped long enough for me to climb into the back seat of his Chevy Blazer. Soon I was under a tarp and other items, well hidden. The ride from there was short and except for a stop at the red zone road block there was no trouble. I was in! In another ten minutes we came to a stop and he let me out of my hiding place. With a last warning he dropped me off saying, “Fifteen minutes, no more. Don’t move beyond where we are. The road we just came in on should be traffic free. I am the only guy surveying the damage here. Back track until you see the check station then take the path on the map, I gave you. Your chances of getting caught are 50/50, but that is what you signed on for. Lastly, if you rat me out. I will make sure you pay big time.” With that he rolled up his window and headed out. Leaving me in a place that resembled another planet.
From the time I was a kid, I guess you could say I was a thrill seeker. I mean, I chose a profession where danger, injury and death were part of the job description. But that never seemed enough. I craved more. Getting involved in extreme sports such as free climbing, without ropes and hang gliding. Some folks said I was just plain crazy, and others were pretty sure I had a death wish. Looking back on it now, I think I was just trying to fill the empty void that was my life. It seems all my addictions, all my attempts at relationships and yes, even my thrill seeking was tied to the fact that there was a hole in my life, and nothing seemed to fill it. For years now that has changed.
I haven’t lost my zest for life. In fact, I am still living on the edge, but not the edge of this world. The edge of eternity. And let me tell you something, there is nothing more thrilling then living the life as a follower of Jesus Christ. The difference is, that I am no longer seeking to fill that void, He has done that. I now find that the risks I take might still mean death and there are a whole lot of people who knew the old John who say I have really gone crazy, fanatical now. And they would be right. My thrill now is leading others, lost as I once was to know Jesus. It is a full and exciting life. The Apostle Paul said it well, “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20) When you take this verse on as your life statement, everything changes. Life takes on a whole new meaning. The challenges and thrills are out of this world, literally!
Sometime in 1981, I stood in that devastation, thrilling at being inside so near to that still erupting volcano. It was awesome and really expensive. Within ten minutes I was arrested. I never knew if the guy who got me in set me up. Either way, my brand-new Pentax with wide angle lens was confiscated, I never saw it again. I paid a large fine and escaped without jail because the courts were overloaded with ‘thrill seekers.’ At the time I still thought it was all worth it. Today, I am thrilled to get up in the morning. I no longer hang glide or hang off shear face, but I seek each day to do the Father’s work and there is little this side of heaven that gets me going like it does. I am now blessed to share those thrills with RuthAnn. No more voids, a full life. NO FEAR, that is what I am talking about.
Blessings and Happy Sabbath,
John
4/5/19
