A lesson in trust…

“I don’t know if I can put this together.” I said staring at the blank paper in front of me. I would be standing in front of a congregation in less than three hours and my sermon was not ready. For the first time in my short career as a speaker I had a loss of confidence. I was frightened and nervous, something new to me.
As I sat talking with RuthAnn and sharing ideas none of it seemed to fit together. And even though I had shared this same sermon/testimony before I was sure this time I had nothing to say or if I did it would come out a jumble. Before she left the room, she asked if I wanted to pray, but I said no. Wrong decision.
The struggles went on for another hour. One piece of paper after another ended up a crumbled ball next to me. Until finally in silence I cried out, “Lord, help! I need your Holy Spirit to guide me.” Things did not straighten out right away, but soon my notes were done. Looking at them I was still not sure if they would be coherent and I asked if RuthAnn would pray with me but even as I did this I knew I was not ready to trust this to the Lord, I wanted to get in the Holy Spirit’s way.
So many times, when the doors of heaven are opened to us we close them because we believe we have a better idea. I love the story of Abraham and Sarah. Maybe you know it. In the book of Genesis God promises Abraham (still called Abram at the time) that even though he was an old man and his wife Sarai (later Sarah) was old and barren, that He would give them a child and their offspring would be as many as the stars in the heavens. The word of God says it like this, “And he brought him outside and said, “Look toward heaven, and number the stars, if you are able to number them,” Then he said to him, “So shall your offspring be.” And he believed the Lord and he counted it to him as righteousness.” (Genesis 15: 5-6)
Abraham believed but Sarah had other ideas. Things weren’t being done in her time and in her way, so she took God’s plan in her own hands, “And Sarai said to Abram, “Behold now, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children. Go in to my servant, it may be that I shall obtain children by her. And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai.” (Genesis 16: 2) And as usual when we take God’s plan for us into our own hands, things got messy.
Yes that servant Haggar had a son, but that boy was not destined to be the progenitor of Israel but the cool thing about this story is, even when we get in God’s way He has Plan B through Z and beyond ready to bring His will into our mess. Sarah, in her old age, has a son by the name of Isaac and he goes on to be the father of many as the stars of heaven. But more importantly the father of the Star of David, Jesus Christ. God’s plan for us is always right, we just need to get out of the way.
It comes down to trust. Something I still struggle with. The Lord has shown me time and again, if I would just put all my trust in Him things will work out beyond my expectations but I have lacked the trust, the faith. The blessing is I have not given up hope and can confess my weakness as I seek to believe, “Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.” (Psalm 9; 10) I continue to seek.
By the time I began to speak my and other’s prayers were answered. The Word of God did go out and my testimony was clear and filled with thanksgiving for what the Lord has done in my life. I had finally trusted and stepped out of the way! When I was finished, my faith was a little stronger. My trust a notch higher. Like all my walk with the Lord, it is step by step, sometimes minute by minute. But the amazing thing is He is there in every one of those steps and every single minute. Today, I believe that more than I did yesterday. How cool it that!
Blessings John
7/31/17