“Thanks for nothing!” I said with disgust and anger as the repo man handed me the paper which explained why he was now readying my car to be towed away. He just smiled and said, “Read ‘em and weep, buddy! Your loss is my gain.” With that he laughed.
I stood there holding the paper and wanting to do something, anything. Attack him, stop him. But I knew I was powerless, there was really nothing I could do but watch my only mode of transportation being hauled away. The car was the last possession I had except my work tools that I hadn’t hocked, now it was gone too. I watched as he climbed into the tow truck and pulled away. The sound of his laughter ringing in my ears, mocking me for my stupidity.
As I returned to my motel room in the seedy dive I called home. I saw others peeking out their windows. “I bet they are all getting a good laugh too.” I thought as I unlocked my door. Misery loves company, and this was sure the place where misery resided. “I am glad I can provide you losers with some entertainment!” I muttered as I closed myself in the dark room. Now what?
How would I get to work? Maybe I could hit my boss up for a drag on my pay or a loan. No way, that guy can’t even afford to pay us every week as it is. Well, I guess the best thing to do is catch rides with one of my crew for now and I will have to hoof it around town. Most everything is within walking distance; the bar is only a few blocks away and there is a food store right across the street. It was going to be another wonderful holiday season, bah humbug!
As I laid now on the bed the ancient springs protested with moans and squeaks. Three days until Thanksgiving and I had absolutely nothing to be thankful for. I had no family who even knew where I was. No real friends, just guys I worked with and they had lives of their own. I could not think of one thing I to be joyful about. I rolled over and turned on the beside lamp, it threw off a pale-yellow glow. Digging out my wallet I counted a little over one hundred bucks, all I had to my name until pay day, two days away, but it would do. Right now, I needed a drink, maybe several. There was another place where misery loved company and I was going to drown my sorrows there. I rose, looking for my keys, then remembered… no car. “Thanks for nothing!”
On this day after Thanksgiving, as I write this, I am surrounded by family here and am missing my family that are far away but always in my heart. My sweet wife just shared breakfast with me and as we always do before eating we shared a prayer of thanksgiving and love. I am a blessed man. I am always amazed at how the man I was became this guy who has so much. I cannot say that it was an easy road or even that I am at the end of it. But I can say that it started when I was overwhelmed by one fact, our God is love.
You see, many of my problems and my addictions stemmed from the complete misunderstanding I had of this overused word, love. I have written blogs sharing that I looked for love in all the wrong places, that is for sure. But even more than that I had no idea of what love truly was until I grasped the idea of a God nailed to a cross, dying in my place. Me, this wretched guy read this, “God showed His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) That was a love beyond my understanding, but it was the place where my life changed, at the foot of the cross. And as I accepted it, slowly the light replaced the darkness. Joy replaced unhappiness. And I saw worldly love for what it truly is, nothing. Nothing if it is not centered on God, who is love. I became something else, thankful.
For the past five Thanksgivings, I had been blessed to be part of a ministry that reminded me of my own blessings. Each year the Community Services of the Grants Pass, Oregon SDA Church opened our fellowship hall doors to share a Thanksgiving dinner with those who are in need. Each of those years I was there and was also reminded that when we received the forgiving love of our God, we need to share it. This year, I was far from Oregon with my wife’s family in Florida. But I was still blessed because my best friend and Community Service leader, Larry, shared that there had been more guests than ever, the love of God was growing. And even as I missed being there, I had one more thing to be thankful for. As I said, I am blessed.
But that miserable man who had just seen his car repossessed turned to alcohol for consolation, he found none. But even then, he had things to be thankful for. He did not see them then, but I see them now, love so patient that it could not even be deterred by addictions or a sinful life. Yes, that guy, who has become this guy had a Savior who, “…himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By His wounds we have been healed,” (1 Peter 2:24)
I am healed and hopeful as we begin this holiday season. I pray that you may experience His healing love today. If you felt your Thanksgiving was not very love filled or thankful, seek Him today. No need to wait for a special day, this is your ‘thanks giving’ day if you are ready.
Blessings John
11/24/17