Terry was a homespun philosopher, probably not that uncommon for a bartender. But he was unlike so many I have known for reasons I will explain. I first met Terry when I started drinking in a Tumwater Washington bar in the early 1980’s. In those days I was working as a Rod Buster on swing shift at the Satsop Nuclear Power Plant. I never was much of a sleeper so would be in bed maybe around 4:00 in the morning and up by 10:00 just in time for the bar to open.
It was Terry who opened the bar five days a week, so he and I became well acquainted over the two years I drank there. I’d show up right as the doors were opening at first, but I kept coming earlier and earlier, and within a short time Terry would leave the back door open and allow me to help get the bar set up in return for a few eye openers.
It was during these times that he and I had many conversations. No matter what we talked about Terry was always on the positive side of every subject. I, on the other hand, was a natural born cynic. Always looking for the black cloud and most of the time finding it. I remember one conversation we had because it was on a subject I avoided the most during my drunk years, God.
I did not know Terry was a Christian. I had seen things that would have led me to believe he was but, I was not sure until that morning. The conversation started as many of ours did, casual and general about something that was in the news. I don’t recall what it was that set me off, but I do remember when he took a stand about the love of God and Jesus as his savior that I lost it.
It is a long time ago, but I think that part of our conversation went something like this:
Terry- “I see the love of God every day, in all things around me.”
John- “What are you talking about? This world is a mess! Love (expletive)!! The only God I see is one who ‘Loves’ to torture little children! That’s if he even exists, which I don’t believe for a moment!”
Terry- “God is not the torturer. The evil you see in the world comes from sin and one who started it all and loves when we blame it all on God, Satan!”
John- “Yeah right! The devil made me do it! I have heard it all before. Far as I can see there is no God! There is no Devil! And Jesus, well maybe he did exist and have some cool sayings. But most people believe because they need a crutch to lean on. Truth is I don’t see any difference between believers and non-believers. Maybe you Christians put on phony smiles more often. So, what!”
Terry- “All I can tell you is what Jesus has done in my life! I used to drink like you and hated life like you do too. But I found there is more. I learned about a God willing to die just to save me. A God so loving that He is love itself. Jesus didn’t come to just gives us rules to follow, He came to die. Sounds crazy right? But it was the only way. Maybe you have heard people talk about John 3:16?”
John- Come on (expletive)! Don’t start quoting the Bible to me! Just give me another drink. I am never going to believe so forget it…. “
Terry- “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16) I know that love today. I want you to also…”
John- “The only love I have is, I would love another drink… Never mind, I’ll get one at the house. I am out of here.”
I left quickly before Terry could say more and I avoided the bar from then on. We would see each other once and a while but I never drank in that bar again. A year later I moved from Washington to southern California. So why do I tell you this story? Because I was never the same after I walked out the door of that old bar. No, I did not have a miraculous conversion the next day or even for the next 25 years. But every now and again that conversation would come back to me. It wasn’t only the words that were spoken, it was Terry himself. I would be in a bar where some bartender was rude, crude and socially unacceptable and I would remember Terry. Never rude or crude, kind and I guess you could say loving, even to a bunch of drunks. There was no doubt he was different.
Crazy thing is that after I accepted Jesus, I found myself on the other end of a similar conversation. No, it wasn’t in a bar. But it was with someone who was as nasty and unbelieving as I had been. I heard myself saying almost the same thing Terry said to me and quoting John 3:16. That conversation ended abruptly like the one we had so many years ago. My only prayer is that my testimony will stick with him and one day the Holy Spirit will do the rest.
We never know how our attitude and words affect others. Jesus said this, “You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to the whole house. (Matthew 5:14-15). Today I want to reflect the light of Jesus and pray it brings some one out of the darkness, even for a moment. I learned from Terry years ago if you let a little light in, darkness is never the same. And may that be true for you today also.
Blessings John
1/24/18
