Month: May 2018

Hanging around people with cancer can be a mixed bag. Over the last two and a half weeks, I have been visiting the cancer radiation center here in Macon, Georgia and I have had a chance to talk to a few patients and listen to their stories.

First, when having radiation treatments it means five days a week, Monday through Friday. Normally at the same time every day. Mine is scheduled for 8:00 each morning. This also means I run into the same folks coming in around my time. We get to talk a bit and normally the conversation is about my treatment versus theirs. Most the men are coming because of prostate cancer and most of the women, breast cancer. And for everyone I have met this is their first go-round with radiation, except for me.

When I tell anyone that I had 48 treatments twelve years ago, the re-action is one of hope for some and others already have a hope beyond anything I can give them. Some want to know more and understand why my treatments were so successful. Others just praise God. I was talking with a guy yesterday. He was on his 40th of 43 treatments. I could see that there was some doubt about how effective they were going to be. Then I told him my story. I heard a little more hope in his voice. Unfortunately, we did not get to complete our conversation, but I believe he will remember the guy who was still hanging in there 12 years beyond radiation. I hope so.

Last week I was talking to a woman who was scheduled for 38 treatments for a breast cancer tumor. She was one of those really ‘up’ kind of people smiling and confident. She talked about having faith. When I told her my story, she just nodded and said God still had plans for both of us. I guess that time she gave me hope I will remember.

Of the four folks I have talked to it is split right about down the middle of those who are relying on faith and those who are just trusting modern medicine to pull them through or just hanging on.

I understand both. I remember 2007 when I was like those who came there every day seeking for the treatments to be the answer. I wanted to beat the odds and live, but I always had that feeling of despair and maybe even desperation. Now in 2018 I relate to the people I have talked to who hang on to their faith. They are ready for whatever He has planned for them. No despair and certainly no desperation.

The truth is you don’t have to hang out with cancer patients to find this divide in the world. The fact is that the percentages of those who live without faith or trust in God I think far outweigh those that do. But what I think most of them do not realize is that you don’t have to be a cancer patient to be close to death. We live in a vulnerable world and there are no promises when we get up in the morning that we will still be here that evening.

Jesus had this warning, “But know this, that if the master of the house had known what part of the night the thief was coming, he would have stayed awake and would not have let his house be broken into.” (Matthew 24:43) Really in the end that is what faith is, vigilance and not taking any day of our life for granted. Living each one as if it was our last.

When we live in faith knowing we have already been saved by the grace of God and the cross of Jesus, to me each day becomes brighter and more of an adventure. I want to see what that day will bring, and I am prepared to not let Satan steal one precious moment.

With the re-occurrence of cancer, I think I am more aware of what each day means but also, I have an urgency and I want to live in these words of Jesus, “Do you not say, ‘There are yet four months, and then comes the harvest?” Behold, I say to you, lift up your eyes and look on the fields, that they are already white for the harvest.” (John 4:35) Each one of these days are not just about my survival but of sharing the miracle of life and life everlasting.

Tomorrow and for the next 20 weekdays I am praying I will be able to share hope with those folks who are coming for treatments. Not just my story of cancer but my story of hope and joy. I think my friend was right when she smiled and said, “I think God still has plans for us!” All I must do is live those plans with everything I have and by His grace maybe one more person will find hope in Jesus Christ. How about you?

Blessings John,
5/16/18

I have written before that I was really into rock and roll music as far back as I can remember. I was born right at the dawn of its popularity, so I guess you could say I grew up with it. Not that my father or mother wanted to hear it in our home. But one way or the other it permeated my early life.

Looking back or even when I hear some of those songs today, the one thing that strikes me is what a searching generation we all were. There was so much about the world that we were going to change. Some sought to do it through revolution and there were songs which spoke to that crowd. There were those who thought drugs were the answer and songs were written to lead us into that culture. Of course, there were those who believed love would conquer all. There were hundreds of tunes that proclaimed how that would occur. I listened to them all yet did not see the world around me changing in any good ways. I eventually concluded it was all hype. Disillusioned like so many kids of the 60’s I turned to drugs and disco by the late 70’s.

As the 80’s dawned I was totally lost in the party scene. It was the days of flowered shirts, gold chains and designer cocaine. The music now was all about how to please ourselves and to “…party like it was 1999” whatever that meant. I think most of us took it to mean we should party like there was no tomorrow, I was certainly into that. Over and over I heard songs saying, “its your thing, do what you wanna do” and it became my philosophy and sadly my religion. It was all about ‘me’. And I was not alone, it was so pervasive that time is still know today as the ‘Me Decade’.

The strange thing as the 90’s began I was longing for the days when I thought there could be change in my life and in the world around me. I became nostalgic and drug out the old albums hoping that the music could create some kind of magic. Of course, it didn’t, it just left me feeling empty and searching for what was missing. I now was melancholy and even drugs and alcohol could not revive my spirit. I asked myself, “What did I miss?” Approaching forty and the world was so much worse than the one I was born into.

It wasn’t until 2009 that I was able to see that the answers I was seeking really could not be found in the lyrics of a rock and roll song or in a line of speed or in another drink. The answers were not in revolution or in books or worldly love. All these things meant nothing unless they were founded and rooted in Jesus Christ. He is the one and only life changer. He is the one and only world changer too. When I could finally wrap my head around that I saw how truly revolutionary it really is.

In fact, when you study world history using a Biblical prospective, there has only been two revolutions since the creation of the world. The first occurred in the garden of Eden with the fall of mankind. The rise of Satan’s power over us. But as soon as it begins God promises us a second revolution will take place crushing Satan’s power, “I will put enmity between you and the woman. And between your seed and her seed. He shall crush your head and you will bruise his heel.” (Genesis 3:15) Jesus would fulfill those words. He would come bringing the revolution that not only ends Satan’s power but restores anyone who believes in Him.

For me, when I allowed Jesus to revolutionize my life then I finally began to understand how any of us can change the world and it is a lot simpler than I would have ever imagined. Just share what Jesus has done in my life and I can create change one person at a time or many. Not just to create a better world here and now but for eternity.

Jesus final message to His disciples was, “Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you, and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20) Those same followers of Jesus within less than fifty years after His death revolutionized the Roman empire. And we can do the same.

It is unfortunate that we did change the world with sex, drugs and rock and roll. But only to deepen Satan’s hold on this place. I guess I can say I was part of that revolution, but I can’t say I am proud of it. Today I want change in your life and I want it in mine, but if I am going to offer it to you in a song, it would go like this:

Amazing grace how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found.
Was blind but now I see.

Catchy tune don’t you think?

Blessings John,
4/14/18

I have done so many crazy things in my life it is hard to understand sometimes how I made it to this place in one piece. Of course, I believe it is God’s plan and God’s will, but I still think I challenged His planning many times!

One that comes to mind, happened years ago when I was working and living in Utah. A few people I knew were going to Cheyenne, Wyoming for what I think they call now Frontier Days. I thought back then it was called Pioneer Days, but I could be wrong. Anyway, it is an all-out celebration which I think runs for about ten days. There is a rodeo that has the best riders in the country and sure enough there is a whole lot of partying going on.

Cheyenne is not a big town but during this event the population explodes. Back in the day, getting a motel room was impossible. We had planned to do what many did, camp out and live rough for a few days. The rest of our plan was to see as much of the rodeo as we could over the weekend and join in any of the rest of the festivities as possible.

The one thing, for sure, Cheyenne was not lacking in was bars. There were a whole lot of them. Seeing I drove my own vehicle I headed downtown while some of the others scouted out a good place for camping. I figured I would just have a few drinks then I was supposed to meet up with the group at the fair grounds around one in the afternoon, that was about two hours away. My problem then and still would be now, I could never just have a few drinks.

Well, I did just have a few but that was a few in a bunch of different bars. Of course, I lost track of time and when I finally looked at my watch it was around one thirty. This was the days before cell phones, I had no way to call my friends, so I decided I would just get in my truck and see if I could find them once I got over to the fair grounds. There was only one problem. I couldn’t find my truck. Completely lost and drunk I wandered the streets for what seemed hours.

I knew I had parked it in a lot but for the life of me I couldn’t find it. Finally, as I was passing a bar I decided just to go in and have a few more. Maybe I could recall the name of the street or maybe the name of that first bar I drank in. But all it led to was more drinking and when I left that place it was dark. Man, I was tired and as I came upon a little place that had benches I decided to sit down. The next thing I knew I was being rousted by cops and without getting into what happened, suffice it to say I ended up in a jail cell. Drunk and disorderly was the charge. Once again, I had let alcohol decide my fate.

This was an all too typical story from my years struggling with addictions. I would start out with good intentions. Go some place to enjoy and have a good time. But I would never choose to do so sober. And because of that most of my good intentions were wasted.

We are just wrapping up a 14-week session of Celebrating Life in Recovery. An awesome program which I have been involved in for years. If you have been following this blog, you know I have written about it several times. And in fact, there is a link for the ministry somewhere on the page you are reading right now. If you are interested check it out. In the 13th week we always review the 12 steps that are part of all the first 12 weeks of the program. These steps and the Bible verses associated with them can truly change lives. I thought today I would share them:

THE 12 STEPS

STEP 1
We admitted we were powerless over our addictions and compulsive
behaviors, that our lives had become unmanageable.

“I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature, For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out,” (Romans 7:18)

STEP 2

We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore
us to sanity.

“For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to His good
purpose.” (Philippians 2:13)

STEP 3

We made a decision to turn our wills and our lives over to the care of God.

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as Iiving sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship.”(Romans 12:1)

STEP 4

We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

“Let us examine Our ways and test them and let us return to the Lord.”
(Lamentations 3:40)

STEP 5

We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact
nature of our wrongs.

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for each other that
you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

STEP 6

We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

“Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will lift you up.” (James 4:10)

STEP 7

We humbly asked Him to remove all our shortcomings.

‘If we confess our sins He is faithful and just and forgive us our sins and
purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

STEP 8

We made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make
amends to them all.

“Do unto Others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31)

STEP 9

We made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to
do so would injure them or others.

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your
gift,” (Matthew 5: 23-24)

STEP 10

We continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong,
promptly admitted it.

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t
fall (1 Corinthians 10:12)

STEP 11

We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact
with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to
carry it out.

“let the word of Christ dwell in you richly.” (Colossians 3:16)

STEP 12

Having had a spiritual experience as a result of these steps, we tried to carry
this message to others and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

“Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.” (Galatians 6:1)

You see these 12 steps are not just for us who are lost in addictions they are a new and better way to do a check up on your own walk with God. Maybe this is a good day to start and draw closer to Him.

I never did find my friends and when I finally got out of jail I remembered where my truck was, but it had been impounded. It was a costly weekend and I never did get to the rodeo! I am blessed I did make it through those times and now every time I do a 12-step checkup, I am reminded how far God has led me and how far I still must go. I pray if you are struggling today these steps may help and bless you also.

Blessings and Happy Sabbath, John

5/11/18

When you write a blog three times a week, every week, some days it is hard to put words on the page. Today is one of those days. Yesterday I received a ministerial set back that could change all the work I do for the Lord going forward from here.

I cannot discuss what happened or at least not yet, but it was truly devastating to me. You know it was one of those times when everything was going right and with prayer and confidence in the Lord I made moves to spread the recovery ministry I have been working with. Then in a flash there are road blocks in the way I would have never thought of.

It is frustrating because I have seen how the ministry has been meaningful and the way we have been going about it has made a difference in people’s lives. But now I can only think that what my plans were, were not the plans God had or has.

Have you ever been there? Have you ever for years been following a path which you believe is what God wants you to do and then it is stopped dead in its tracks? I am sure if you have, you know that it can lead you down two different paths and in the last twelve hours I have been down both.

If you have followed this blog, you probably know that I am cynical. Normally I have a joyful disposition but when I meet with negativism I become negative myself. Well that was my first reaction yesterday. I wanted to throw out the baby with the bath water. Selfishly I thought, if I cannot do this the way I want than I don’t want to do it at all. I am tired and just want to give up. But with lots of encouragement from RuthAnn I now can see that if I am going to truly trust in God, I must be able to trust Him in these times too.

So, this morning I have been searching the scriptures and digging into the promises and I thought I would share some of them with you. Maybe you need a few of these this morning, like I do:

Psalm 40: 2-3- “He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord.” First thing I must do when I look forward is look back. Back to where I was when the Lord saved me. I was in the pit of destruction and walking in quick sand. But I am now standing firm on the rock, that is Jesus Christ and through him I have been able to encourage others. So, should a setback defeat me? I think you know the answer to that!

Proverbs 3: 5-6- “Trust the Lord with all your heart, and don’t depend on your own understanding. Remember the Lord in all you do, and he will give you success.” When I seek to depend on myself and my understanding of God’s plan I can and do get lost. What I need to do is trust it all and I mean all to Him and His success will be with me.

Philippians 3: 13-14- “Brothers, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching for the things that are ahead with this goal in mind, I strive toward the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” If I am burdened with the past and not keeping my eyes on the prize, I believe I cannot hear the upward call of God. Today is a new day. If I am burdening myself with negative thoughts, I am wasting my time. Don’t you think?

Isaiah 41:10- “So do not fear; for I am with you; for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” When I am despairing in any way and especially when Satan is plaguing me with doubts I turn to this verse.

In the end it comes down to who do I believe, who do I trust. The truth is I have been saved from a life of addictions. I have been blessed to write this blog and share what God does in my life every day. I have been given a wife who laughs when I laugh and cries even harder than I do when I am down. There is a God who loves me so much, He allowed His son to take the death I deserve. So, this morning I truly have nothing to fear and only love and joy to dwell upon. I will be open to whatever and wherever He leads. What about you?

Blessings John

5/9/18

I was in the gym again this morning at around 4:00 AM. Not unusual, am there five days a week and normally arrive four to four-thirty. But Mondays are the toughest day for me. After a two-day layoff getting back on the treadmill and working the machines takes more effort than any other day.

When I was active in construction, I used to laugh at folks who went to the gym to stay in shape. Paying money to do what companies paid me to do for a living, lifting weight and walking all day long. If I would have had one of those ‘Fitbit’ things back in the day, I am sure I would have racked up huge amounts of steps. Not that I ever cared to count them. I think it would have made me tired just knowing.

Now I am being told by our insurance company that we must keep a record of all this health stuff or they will penalize us. I guess I understand, there is no doubt that we have become a nation of big eaters and exercise is something we do while looking for the remote! Foods we eat the most come prepared in boxes or from a fast food restaurant. And sitting in front of our favorite device is our national sport.

I am not excluding myself from this. When I decided to move from field work into an office as a manager, both my diet and my physical condition suffered greatly. From the years 2002 through 2014 I struggled with health problems that could be traced to my lifestyle. But strangely enough the positive changes in both diet and exercise came about when I was diagnosed with advanced Prostate Cancer in 2006.

At that time, I was a carnivore first and vegetable eater second. There was nothing I loved more than a couple of well cooked pork chops and potatoes fried up in the dripping from the chops. If I had to eat a vegetable maybe a salad or a small side of green beans. It was my daughter sending me a cook book explicitly for prostate cancer survivors that began the change.

The book was entitled, “The Taste for Living”. It came about because financer Mike Milken was diagnosed with advanced Prostate Cancer in 1993. On the advice of dieticians, he went from a diet based on meats to becoming a vegetarian. He struggled with the foods until he hired Beth Ginsburg who showed him that a diet without meat could be nutritious, provide the protein needed and be yummy too. They compiled her recipes into the cook book and in 2007 my daughter sent me a copy. I found it interesting. Some of it I agreed with, I wasn’t going for the idea you could get all the protein needed without meat. But I did cut out all red meats.

But it was not until I began to study the Bible that I could see that all the recommendation in that cook book aligned with what God had wanted for us from the beginning. It was obvious that when we were created that living with and walking with God there was no need to eat flesh. In the first book Genesis and the first chapter, here is what it says, “And God said, behold I have given you every plant yielding seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food.” (Genesis 1:29) Yet I struggled because in later chapters and through out the Bible it seemed God blessed the idea of eating certain meats.

For sure there were unclean meats listed in Leviticus, such as pork and fish without scales that when I examined closely were still the flesh which cause problems if not cooked or cleaned properly. I could see that eliminating them was for sure a good thing. But what about the others, especially chicken? I really loved chicken! Could I find any good reason to stop eating it? And could I really have all the protein I needed if I did?

The ‘Daniel Diet’, was the next convincer for me. In the first chapter of the book of Daniel, he (Daniel) and his three friends had been princes in Israel and when captured by Nebuchadnezzar were first made eunuchs and then given a place with the other captured royalty to be educated by the Chaldeans. This also meant he and his friends could eat the king’s food, Daniel had another plan, “But Daniel resolved that he would not defile himself with the king’s food, or with wine that he drank. Therefore, he asked the chief of the eunuchs to allow him not to defile himself.” (Daniel 1:8) The chief of the eunuchs couldn’t believe anyone would turn down the food a king eats, and he was responsible for them. He was not going to allow them to eat as they wished but Daniel said this, “Test your servants for ten days; let us be given vegetables to eat and water to drink. Then let our appearance and the appearance of the youths who eat the king’s food be observed by you, and deal with your servants according to what you see. (Daniel 1:12-13) After ten days Daniel and his friends were healthier than anyone eating the king’s food. I wanted to test this.

But it took me until my birthday in January of 2015, after much prayer and study. Taking in the health message my church espouses and truly believing, “Do you not know that your bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God. You are not your own; you were bought with a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) That I accepted becoming a vegetarian.

It has been a long journey and I know I am stronger and healthier today than I have ever been. I know that is a strange thing for a guy with cancer to say. But I believe if I would have changed my diet and exercise plan sooner I might still be cancer free today. So, I leave you with a proposition. Why not do a little research. Find a good vegetarian cookbook and try the Daniel challenge. Ten days with just vegetables and healthy drink. Get out and walk for a half hour. I bet you will feel like a new person. The person God wants you to be.

Blessings John

5/7/18