Last year I wrote a series of blogs about the Fruit of the Spirit. Lately I have felt that it was time for me to do so again. So today I am starting at the beginning with: Love!
Love may be the most misused word in the English language. If not misused, then misunderstood. I know this was true for me. In fact, even though I didn’t write the song: “Looking for Love in all the Wrong Places” I certainly lived it. If I tried to delve into the whys of it, it would be because I had a wrong definition of love to start with. Here is an example of what I am talking about, maybe you can relate.
Every relationship excluding the one I am in now (I will get back to this relationship in a bit) started with sex. Most of those relationships began when I and the person I was involved with were under the influence of alcohol or drugs or both. Somewhere along the line the words ‘I love you’ were spoken normally in context of our sexual relationship. Most of the time I did not speak the words first or if I did they were with the idea that it was the right thing to say, certainly not with the idea that I felt some deep abiding emotion. If I am being honest I would have not said those words to anyone unless they said them to me first. Being even more honest, I would have to admit I spoke ‘love’ words many times just so our sexual relationship would not end.
I think you get the idea. To me sex and love were synonymous. I struggled with normal friendships because I was not able to relate to anyone on a deeper basis than comradery in terms of my job or favorite sports teams. This led me to be and think of myself as a ‘loner’. And in some misguided way was even a little proud of it. I did not want anyone to get to close including women I was married to.
I just didn’t get it. I read books about it. Things like, “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” and even during my marriage to Dianne went to see a marriage counselor but something was always missing. Love seemed to be just another four-letter word and I used it a lot less than the swear words of the same length. I couldn’t relate, and it left me without any hope.
My problem and I believe a lot of our world’s problem is a ‘selfish’ one. Self and self-gratification has become a synonym for love. And for me it took a miracle from the Source to finally, after over 50 years, to see what love is or maybe better put, who love is, “Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.” (1 John 4:8)
In one simple phrase the Apostle John blew up everything I had built my life on. I had already accepted Christ as my Savior, but I was not ready for this revelation. You see, if I did accept this idea it would mean all love comes from a source I had not ever been connected to. I would have to surrender everything to Him and start again from scratch. Was I ready for this? And here is where the Holy Spirit came into the story.
As I wrestled with this new concept, almost every day I was led to another passage in the Word of God that would encourage me, but this is one He kept bringing me to time and time again, “In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent His only Son into the world, so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we loved God but that he loved us and sent His Son to be a propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also might love one another.” (1 John 4: 9-11) Love, real ever abiding love was manifest in Jesus Christ at the cross. In this I could find nothing to doubt, nothing to deny. And it was this love that changed my life.
This abiding love that was centered on Jesus, allowed me in Dianne’s last years to love her in a new way. I know that Christ centered love brought peace to her last days. And I was sure that once she passed away I was now destined to life alone and draw closer to Him. But He had other plans.
When RuthAnn and I started sending messages back in 2016, I was not sure where it was leading. But soon it was clear that our lives were being brought together in love. But this time it was in His love and I was shown the depth and meaning of what God had intended for us, Christ centered love that leads us to yearn for Him more as we love one another. It has been amazing and if I still don’t get all what love is, it is because the God I serve is so big I can’t absorb it all.
My prayer for you today is that you find your love center in Jesus. I can testify that it will change not only your life but the life of everyone you touch. If you see it in your life today, shout with the Psalmist and me too, “Give thanks to the God of heaven, for his steadfast love endures forever.” (Psalm 136:26)
Blessings John
6/6/18
