When I was still in addiction and just taking in the precepts of Jesus Christ, I have to admit, I was struggling. Listening to the Bible everyday as part of my ‘peace’ agreement with my wife was opening my mind to different thoughts and a whole lot of questions. One of them centered on this whole idea of the 10 Commandments.
Now as a kid, I had studied Catholic Catechism and I knew there were these rules that supposedly God himself had handed to Moses on tablets of stone. I had seen the movie with Charlton Heston. Moses with this long white beard coming down from the mountain and seeing the Israelites dancing around the golden calf, was really ticked off and threw the tablets to the ground. Later in the movie God gave him another set, that seemed important. I also knew every time I went to confession, I needed to list which one of these laws or rules I might have broken that week. My sins seemed to center around the ones where did something to hurt someone, stole something or took God’s name in vain, it was a weekly event. I would confess them, but it really meant nothing to me. Just something I had to do.
Such was the state of my understanding of God’s law when I graduated from high school. Soon though even that was lost to me. I had become a law breaker. First the failure and stigma of divorce. Soon after that my descension into drug addiction led to crime and more lawlessness. I broke what little connection I had with God and his laws. I began to hate the idea that some controlling entity could told me ‘no’ without care. As my cynical hatred grew, I lost any believe I once held and by all ways and means became an atheist. If God was this ogre who punished and did not love, why would he even exist?
With all this baggage overloading me in 2010, I began to listen to the Bible, walking 45 minutes each day with my MP3 player. Over the period of about 4 months I walked every day and I listened to the entire thing. As I finished the book of Revelation, I had kept my part of the bargain. I had done exactly what my wife had challenged me to do. Now I could quit and go back to being me. But I didn’t. I kept walking and I started over from the beginning. This time when I got to the book of Exodus, and I came to the part about the Ten Commandments, something struck me. I had a feeling about it the first time I listened but now I was sure, these commandments were not correct. Something was wrong, they did not match the ones I had repeated, ad nauseum, in Catholic Catechism classes. What was going on?
It would not let me go so I dug around and found the ‘real’ commandments in a Catholic Catechism, just as I had learned them so many years ago:
1.I am the Lord thy God; thou shalt not have strange gods before me.
2. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.
3. Remember thou keep holy the Lord’s Day.
4. Honor thy father and thy mother.
5. Thou shall not kill.
6. Thou shalt not commit adultery.
7. Thou shalt not steal.
8. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.
9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife.
10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s goods.
If I was taught these, why were the ones in the Bible so different, even the abbreviated list I found online:
- You shall have no other gods before Me.
- You shall make no idols.
- You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.
- Keep the Sabbath day holy.
- Honor your father and your mother.
- You shall not murder.
- You shall not commit adultery.
- You shall not steal.
- You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
- You shall not covet.
I was confused. How could this book that everyone assured me was the Word of God have the wrong commandments? I wanted to just quit and say, “Who really cares? Just a bunch or stories anyway!” But I could not let it go, or maybe you could say the Holy Spirit would not let me go.
So, I began a long journey. Sometimes it was painful as I learned about Catholic history. It was evident I was taught things that were opposed to the Bible, including the Ten Commandments. As I looked further, into the New Testament, I knew it was not Jesus’ teachings, it was man, who because of pagan believes that had crept into the church, who could no longer abide in two of God’s Commandments. So, amazingly the Second Commandment was removed. Idols, statues of dead saints now became the center of worship. If I was going to believe in the book I was studying, how could I accept the idea that the very thing God had condemned over and over, the worship of idols, was now ok.
Then the fourth commandment became the third, but it no longer spoke of the same day. God had set aside a day, the seventh, to be with his creation. I saw it in the very first part of Genesis. Then again as God gave Moses the law, he said this, “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the LORD your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your manservant or maidservant, nor your animals, nor the alien within your gates.” (Exodus 20: 8-10) It was so specific and why would it change or be change to where now we should worship on the first day? On top of that the tenth commandment now became the 9th and the 10th. My thoughts were if ALL these were written by the finger of God, why would they ever be changed?
I found myself in a dilemma of belief for the first time in years, I had to decide. I knew I could no longer go back to total disbelief, so I had to choose what to believe. In the end it was simple. If I was able to accept that man could change God’s Law, then nothing else in the Bible could be true or real. If you take someone’s heart away, they quit living. I saw, even though I was still miles from becoming a true believer, that if you took the heart of the Word of God away there was nothing left to believe. Over the next two years I chose God and His Word. I chose to believe this, “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. (Hebrews 4:12)
Now years later, as the Sabbath approaches, I am blessed by God’s Commandments. All of them. They have become a joy not a burden. People can argue and they can claim but not “a jot or a tittle” will be changed. I have chosen to believe every Word that comes forth from the mouth of God, not man. So, I can say to you all with a loving heart, Happy Sabbath!
Blessings
John
3/22/19
