It was a busy Friday night. The restaurant had been full since the doors opened at four. Heat in the tight galley kitchen was intense. Tempers and anger were flaring up among the kitchen staff and waitresses. As usual the head chef was barking orders and not making matters any better. He especially was on my case. There were a lot of sauté orders stacking up and as Saucier, the chef in charge of sauces and all sautéed items, I was behind. Usually, these kinds of nights were what I liked the best about being back in a kitchen after years away, but this night l was not in any mood to put up with Chef de Cuisine’s, my boss’, guff.
I was ‘jonesing’. It had been a week since I had snorted any meth or even had a drink. Once again trying to kick it all cold turkey. It just was not working. My AA sponsor had told me at the meeting the night before that I was at a critical point of my recovery. How many times had I heard that, from how many different AA sponsors? Why did I think this time would be any different? I knew what I needed, and no AA meeting or sponsor could give it to me. I just needed a long cold whiskey and coke and maybe about an eight ball of speed. How many hours till this shift was done? My heart was racing, and I really wanted to kill the ‘boss’.
Then it happened. An order came through for sauteed chicken livers. Now, I had sauteed enough chicken livers to clear out more than a few hen houses. But for some reason that was it! The boss in my face, the heat of the kitchen, my jones. I exploded across the room, sauté pan in hand. I guess I was going to throttle the Chef. I don’t know. But then something even weirder happened. Peace! Not like total tranquility or some psycho babble but a moment in the midst of all my anger, all my junk. For just a moment I saw and felt something different. It stopped me in my tracks. For years I could not explain that moment. But I know now I was given a glimpse of what I now know as grace. Grace that surpasses all understanding and grace so totally undeserved. Whatever it stopped me, and I returned to my station and finished my shift.
Has it happened to you? Have you been in an intendable situation where you could do something that would ruin your life, and something stops you? Have you ever thought about what that was that turned you away from disaster? Maybe it didn’t happen like the one I just described. Maybe you were guided to take a turn and go a different route than you normally do on the way to work only to find that you avoided a sever accident. For a moment you get a glimpse of something that has probably happened in your life a hundred times. Small things you have just called coincidence or mere luck. What if instead it was and is the hand of God? What if there are no coincidences, there is no such thing as luck. There is only God’s grace and mercy. If you believed this, could it change your life. It did mine!
No, certainly not at that time in my life. I would return to addictions and even worse things were still in store for me. But also, there would be several more times when His grace would save. His mercy would uphold.
I guess you could ask, “What took you so long?” Why if God revealed Himself to you so many times in so many ways, didn’t it change you sooner. To be perfectly honest I don’t have the answer to that. I can only say He has let me live long enough to know the truth and share it. Once again, His grace and His mercy!
So, why do I write about this? That one I can answer. I do not want anyone who reads this to wait. Today is the day to start looking at life in a different way. To test what I am saying is true. To read this from God’s Word and believe:
“But He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you [My lovingkindness and My mercy are more than enough—always available—regardless of the situation]; for [My] power is being perfected [and is completed and shows itself most effectively] in [your] weakness.” Therefore, I will all the more gladly boast in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ [may completely enfold me and] may dwell in me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 (Amplified Bible)
God’s grace is sufficient, even when you are not aware He is giving it freely. God’s mercy is eternal and always there even when you or I do not claim it. That is why I no longer believe in coincidence or luck. He has saved me for such a day as this. I will need His grace today and His mercy too. If you believe it or not so, will you! He is that loving that He is willing to give all no matter what. It’s your ‘lucky’ day!
Blessings
John
9/1/2021
